Christian League had the SeedyUnderbelly shutdown

Sulphur

2009-06-22T16:40:00.000-07:00

As I sit here typing, I notice that I have an extremely awesome farmer tan acquired by spending copious amounts of time in the Black Rock desert. Yes, my friends, it is field school time. What is field school you are asking? Well, allow me to tell you. Field school is basically a crash course in archaeology and the way universities exploit students for free labor.
The site, Sulphur, is an old mining town founded in the late 1800s and abandoned around the 1950s. The first week of school was spent doing inventory. Basically this means walking around and figuring out just exactly what is out there. Each of us was assigned a transect, or a specific course to follow. We stood about 30 meters apart and walked and walked and walked, flagging anything of interest. I seriously had ADD, because I could not stay in a straight line. I would see something cool and run over to flag it, forgetting that I was supposed to stick to my transect. Needless to say, my first run was not a straight line. But, as is usually the case, I got better as time went on.
Next, we defined features. A feature can be anything from the remains of a house, to a scatter of cans left out in the desert. In the end we had over 100 features. They ranged anywhere from a mound of dirt left by people prospecting for gold, to an intact dugout, lined with cardboard boxes.
After defining the features, we set out to record them. My partner is a tall redheaded guy whom I will call Opie. I feel bad for him because he is getting slowly roasted out in the desert. He borrows SPF 70 sunscreen from another student, whom I will call SpongeBob, due to his smashing rendition of the SpongeBob campfire song (more about that later.) He doesn't talk very much, but that is okay because I more than make up for his lack of conversation. We spend the day taking angles, drawing feature maps, and measuring cans. We also manage to chase lizards, particularly horny toads. We have found three and named them Harvey, Tyler, and Roy.
We have been particularly lucky this year to have rain everyday. This, as you can imagine, makes sleeping in a tent quite pleasant and fun!
Due to the intensity of the sun (when it is not raining) we work from 6:30 to 2:30. After that everyone is exhausted and we basically all fall asleep until eating dinner at 5. We have decided that we are running on senior citizen time because we go to bed at 8. The downtime is spent telling offensive stories to one another. I know that you are thinking and they are not all from me!! SpongeBob might just possibly talk more than I do. I know, shocking! I can tell that sometimes he gets on another student, Alaska's nerves. I have taken advantage of this fact to amuse myself. I try, whenever possible, to get SpongeBob to sing the campfire song, just to annoy Alaska. Last Friday they finally figured out what I was doing, to which SpongeBob replied, "Natalie, we are not your playthings." I disagree.
Because this just wouldn't be a blog posting from me unless it discussed the bathroom in some shape or form, I will honor you would more information than you could ever want. The nice accommodations reside at our campsite. We have a nice wooden box with an attached toilet seat residing over a freshly dug hole. The view from the latrine is quite stunning. One morning I was watching the sunrise as I did my morning business. When I stood up I noticed a ginormous black widow centimeters from where my bum had been. It was super disturbing.
The bathroom at the site is non existent. The land is completely flat and there isn't a tree to be found. The guys have it easy. Basically they walk like ten feet away and turn around. The girls have to walk a good ten minutes to find anything big enough to act as cover.
Well, I am off. More next week!

The end of it all, possibly.

2009-05-12T19:14:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know. It has been a little while since I have bored you all with snippets from my life. This semester started out slooooow and finished extra fast. The difference? Working two jobs in addition to school. Who'd have thought? Crazy.

Today was my last class of the semester, but I am learning that grad school, at least grad school in anthropology, never ends. Instead of getting a nice long summer break, I am supposed to attend not one, but two 5 week digs in the Nevada desert. Yay!!!!

Tomorrow bright and early I have to someone returning artifacts to the museum that have been missing since 1996. I think this is my finest accomplishment during my time in the museum. My job has technically ended there, but I just couldn't refuse their return. :)

Okay, possibly my most boring post ever! But I am in the middle of laundry and cleaning so this will have to do. :(

Nevada Desert

2009-03-28T17:28:00.000-07:00

Owwww, I am so sore! I spent yesterday afternoon wandering around in the Nevada desert with a fellow archaeology student looking for artifacts. 5 hours wandering up and down sand dunes. Not the smartest idea for a fatty like me. But the guy I was with was super nice and waited for me each time I had to butt-slide down a dune. Fine, I was hoping you didn't notice, but I am sure you did. Yes, I went out into the Nevada desert with some guy. I realize this could have been very stupid of me. As in I was clear out in the middle of nowhere and could have easily been murdered. Then in about 10 years, my eerily persevered body would have been dug up by a golden retriever out on a hike with its master. And to complete the circle, a forensic anthropologist would be called in to examine my corpse. But that didn't happen and I am back in Reno and everything hurts.
We went to Bohunk Camp, an early 20th century campsite for Slavic workers on the Carson River. We didn't find anything left of the site, but we did trespass, by uh accident, on a restricted area of government land. Next, we went looking for Chinese pottery to verify that Chinese immigrants had occupied the area. All we found were a lot of cans, broken glass, and WIE. Oh and a lot of lizards. They guy I was with seriously had ADD and had to chase after every one. I think he was just keeping himself amused while I caught up with him, wheezing. But so goes the life of an archaeologist.
Anyway, it was fun to get a taste of what it is like to work in the field.

Week 3

2009-02-05T20:21:00.000-08:00

Highlights from my first three weeks back in Reno:

Returning home to find that my roommates hadn't emptied the garbage the entire time I was gone. Do you know what cabbage smells like after it has sat out for 5 weeks? I do.
Finding out that my internship at the museum wasn't just brunt work - it was actually running the museum. It is all I can do not to run screaming in a blind panic as I have no idea how to run the day to day operations of a museum. Night of the Museum, my only previous museum experience, did not prepare me for this. Stay at the museum until midnight hoping that it will come to life and help me with the day to day work. Sadly, the drawer full of dead weasels stayed deceased. Extreme disappointment sets in.
Going to class and learning that anyone who believes that God created the world is a "moron." The next two weeks include such gems as, "I think that eventually speciation will occur as the more enlightened evolutionists segregate themselves from the ignorant individuals who believe that God had his hands in any of this," "Let's drop them off in Antarctica with the bubonic plague and let them pray all they want because it aint gonna save them." I find this especially disturbing coming from anthropologists whose entire goal is to study people different from themselves without bias.
Hitting a saloon on Friday night and a casino on Saturday.
Finding my favorite chocolate cake!
Falling in love with Dean Koontz all over again.
Analyzing a car in the parking lot. A big ole pimped out Black Tahoe. Concluding that it had to belong to a Caucasian male. Watching a tiny Asian female get in and drive away.

What list did I get on?

2009-01-21T19:46:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I received an invitation to the grand opening of the maternity ward at the local hospital. Today I received an invitation to the local bridal show. Um, what list was I put on and how do I get off it?

Stolen from Janet's Blog

2008-12-10T21:50:00.000-08:00

I got this from Janet's blog and couldn't help but let everyone know some of the cool {and not-so-cool} things I've done.Do it yourself! Copy and paste the list into your blog and bold or highlight the items you have done. Here we go....
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Totally copied a post from someone else's blog to your own
I've done 55...you????

More Paper Writing

2008-12-10T16:58:00.000-08:00

Ugh, I know I am sick of it too. In order to write a paper, I have to get into the zone. Unfortunately the zone using come the night before. Ugh. I just want to not write papers. I will do anything else, clean the toilet, watch reruns of Full House, amputate my appendages. But writing a paper is just asking too much. I have had 4 Diet Cokes today trying to motivate myself. All it has done is make me hallucinate. Oh zone, where are you?

Humiliations Galore

2008-12-01T19:49:00.000-08:00

Okay, I have been avoiding this post. But being the true Noel that I am, a good story trumps all personal dignity so here goes . . .

A couple of weeks ago I was sitting in church minding my own business, when it was the ward choir's turn to sing. As the song was about to begin, the bishop noticed that there were only about 4 people total in the choir. So, he did what he is prone to do and called rows out of the audience to come up and sing. Of course, my row was called. Being the good sport I am, I climbed the stairs and sang my hallelujahs. The song went off without a hitch and I started to walk back to my seat.
Unfortunately, inbetween me and the pew was a flight of stairs. No, you say. That is everyone's worst nightmare, but it is just that a nightmare. Everyone worries about falling down the stairs but no one ever does it. Um . . . yup, it happened to me. I totally biffed it. And it wasn't just a slip, it was a full on nose dive. One minute I was standing at the top of the stairs, the next I was flat on my back and everything was dark. So, I am laying there wondering why the world is black, when I realize that the reason I can't see anything is because my skirt is over my head. Please stop laughing. I was thinking this has to be a dream. There is no way anything this horrible could actually happen in real life.

So now I have two options: I can just keep my skirt over my head and crawl out of the building never to return, or I could pull my skirt back down. I did the latter and noticed everyone in the choir, front row, and bishopric staring at me with a horrified look on their faces. I jumped up as fast as I could and yelled I'm okay and walked back to my seat. I sat through the rest of sacrament meeting, every five minutes remembering that it actually happened and was not in reality a dream.

One of my friends later told me that one minute she saw my head and the next my feet were up in the air. Another friend told me I bounced off the side wall and flipped over. It must have been a sight to behold. I am totally psyched about it because I am offically on first base with about half the guys in the ward because they saw my underwear. And the bishop now knows that I am wearing my garments properly. Sadly, my awesome knee-highs did nothing to protect my knees, so I am sporting some pretty sweet rug burns and have a giant bruise on my bum.

Now because I am an optimist I realize that it could have been much worse. I could have knocked myself out and been laying there with my skirt over my head for some time. I also could have chosen that Sunday to wear my fabulous see-through leopard thong. And finally, I could have landed on someone and taken them out with the fall. So see! It wasn't so bad. True, I am now officially inactive, but that is beside the point.

2008-11-18T23:46:00.000-08:00

Yes, that is what you think it is. The stack of books I used to complete my 25 page paper. One down, one more to go!

2008-11-16T11:54:00.000-08:00

Ahh, and so begins another week. The theme of this week is 25 page paper. Hasn't that been the theme for the last 3 weeks some of you might be saying. Yes. And I am only on page six. And it is due Wednesday. I feel like I have been having a root canal for the past three weeks. I am sure that some of you do too because you have been listening to me complain about said 25 page paper. The good news is that by Wednesday I have to be done no matter what. They bad news is on Thursday I have to start my other 25 page paper. Wo is me!

In other news, I believe that Mulan has started a laundry business in our apartment. Please do not think that I am falling prey to a common stereotype. She has been using the washer non-stop for about three weeks now, washing a massive amount of things -there is no way that they could all be hers. The other day she was washing 7 parkas. Her hamper is in its usual spot on top of the washer, but is full of sneakers and swimming googles. I have no idea if she plans to wash the googles. This should be interesting.

One of my roommates is moving out at the end of the month. It seems that Mulan's antics were too much for her, and she is getting out as soon as her lease expires. In the meantime, however, her boyfriend has moved in. Last night I walked downstairs in my p.j.'s to see if I could squeeze a load of laundry inbetween Mulan's, and he was sitting on the couch watching tv. My roommate was not in site. It was a litle uncomfortable to say the least. When I came down later to change my laundry, he was cooking with my pan. Yeah for the end of the month!

Well, that is all the time I can spare my little bloggers. I have to go back hell, I mean 25 page paper.

Fly Your Freak Flag

2008-11-02T20:57:00.001-08:00

My sister-in-law recently announced to the world that she has an unhealthy attachment to cleaning supplies. Her bravery has inspired me to admit that I too have an unhealthy attachment to cleaning supplies commercials. Specifically the commercials where mops and brooms send candy, flowers, and mariachi bands to try and win back their position in the household. I think they are hilarious. For some reason giving inanimate objects human characteristics is my kind of humor. I love to see them anxiously peering around the corner to see if their gift will be accepted. I especially love the broom coming out of the potatoes. And the use of seventies love songs is sheer genius. In fact, I get a little disappointed each time the doorbell rings and there is no flower delivery from Mr. Mop. :(

Potty Emergency!!!!

2008-10-26T20:53:00.000-07:00

I seriously have dreams just like this about once a week.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d_rLSZQOOG0

A Day in the Life

2008-10-20T22:16:00.000-07:00

6:30 -7:50 AM: Wake up and immediately start researching origins of agriculture in Africa. Read two chapters in various books about this subject. Panic because I need to have a 20 minute presentation on topic done by Wednesday and I haven't started yet.
8:00-10 AM: Read two chapters from my anthropological theory textbook. Fall asleep several times. Wipe drool from textbook. Highlight random stuff. Forget everything I just read.
10:30 AM: Get dressed and eat breakfast. Chew extra slowly so I don't have to go back to studying. Glance at my pants that only have one leg hemmed. Realize I will not be wearing said pants to class.
10:50 AM: Print off questions that I need to answer about aforementioned chapters and the book, The Nuer, for class today. Run to Jane and Michael Banks' house for study group.
11:00 AM -12:45 PM: Discuss answers for questions from chapters and The Nuer. Frantically try to come up with answers because I can't remember anything from what I read this morning.
12:45 PM: Run to class. Okay, I know. Walk kind of fast to class. See hot guy run by in shorts. Yay!! Listen to Jane and Michael Banks talk on and on and on and on about self.
1PM -4PM: Class. Try to concentrate on group discussion about previously mentioned questions. Can only think of bladder because I drank a huge Diet Pepsi to make sure I was awake for class. Silently cheer because I was assigned two questions that I actually knew the answer too. Try to sound like I know what I am talking about. Fail miserably about trying to sound like I know what I am talking about.
4 PM: End of class. Walk home extra slow to avoid homework waiting at apartment. Instead of going inside, get into car and drive to Ghetto Mart. Meet homeless guy in parking lot. Walk really fast because he is coming to ask for money. Buy bag of Funions. Come home. Face homework.
4:30 - 5:30 PM: Read article about trophy heads in Peru. Learn lots about decapitating people and turning their skulls into ceremonial jewelry. Notify everyone on my blog that I am reading said article.
5:45 -7:00 PM: Work on essay summarizing said article and explaining why this article demonstrates the relationship between physical anthropology and archaeology. Visit people.com, dear abby, and gmail about 700 times.
7:00 -7:30 PM Receive call from Mom. Laugh about youtube video where bride falls into the pool. Look up videos of guys getting hit in the nuts, describe to mom over the phone, laugh. (Yup, my mom is an over sexed pervert, oh wait, that is me.)
7:30-10 PM Complete aforementioned essay. Interesting tidbit: among the skeletal remains they located an urn that depicted people getting their heads cut off and made into ceremonial necklaces of sorts. One of the pictures portrayed a Deity holding a recently decapitated head with the trachea still attached. Can you say Enrichment activity anyone? Sister Noel! What a beautiful necklace! Is that a real human skull? Why yes! We made them in Enrichment. You know Mormons. We are so crafty!
10:00- 10:30 PM Look at huge pile of books awaiting organization into presentation on origins of agriculture in Africa. Feel hopeless. Accept fact that I will be skipping class tomorrow to finish presentation. Start to read books. Realize this information contradicts information read at 6:30 AM. Mentally kick self for not starting presentation sooner. Decide that I am going to work hard and devote all my time to presentation.
10:30 PM: Give up on presentation. Decide my time is much better spent blogging about my day.
10:48 PM: Post Blog
10:49 PM: Look at stack of books about origins of agriculture. Gouged out eyes with a spoon. Make ceremonial necklace from my own skull.

Decapitation

2008-10-20T18:25:00.001-07:00

I am currently reading “Dismembering Bodies for Display: A Bioarchaeological Study of Trophy Heads from the Wan Site of Conchopata, Peru.” Isn't anthropology cool?

Diet Coke

2008-10-19T16:29:00.001-07:00

Dear Diet Coke,
I just can't quit you.
Love,
Natalie

Highlights from Lab with Firedude

2008-10-17T23:44:00.000-07:00

Firedude: "Whoa! This bone totally looks like Africa."
Me: giggle, giggle, bat eyelashes.

Firedude: "My hand hella hurts something hard."
Me: giggle, giggle, bat eyelashes.

Firedude: "This lab is sucking my a**."
Me: giggle, giggle, bat eyelashes.

Firedude: "Whoa! All my drawings look like cartoon bones. "
Me: giggle, giggle, bat eyelashes.

Firedude: "What is this?"
Me: "Australopithecus Africanus."
Firedude: "How do you spell ostalopy?"

Sad

2008-10-14T18:35:00.000-07:00

Dr. Sensitive Pony Tail Guy: What catastrophic event led to the demise of dinosaurs?
Girl on Front Row: Noah's Flood?

Edumacation

2008-10-12T20:32:00.001-07:00

I have been staring at the computer screen for 30 minutes trying to come up with an abstract for my paper. I have to accept that it may not happen. So, instead I started to blogstalk. About seven clicks in, I ended up on the page of a guy I went to school with. Wow. I now feel old, lame, and slacker-like. Where have the past 10 years gone? Did I actually say ten?

High School Graduation!
Internship in DC
Westminster Freshman Year
Deseret Book
Westminster Sophomore Year
England
Westminster Junior Year
Computer Lab
Westminster Senior Year
Huge Breakup
China
College Graduation!
The Lending Group
The Rental
Mission - El Salvador
Duplex
CCHS
Mt Pleasant
Hunter's Woods
Greenwood Ave
New Zealand
Mommy's Surgery
Papa Jay's
UoP
Newton's basement
Reno
First Year UNR

JUST PLAIN WEIRD

2008-10-02T21:03:00.001-07:00

I can't believe that I have never discussed Dr. Sensitive Ponytail Man, my physical anthro professor. He reminds me of the kid in junior high who tried so hard to be cool and failed miserably. Oh wait, that kid in junior high was me. He constantly name drops all the famous anthropologists he knows. That is like going to the school dance and asking your date which Dungeons and Dragons character is her favorite. This is an intro course. Everyone is there because they didn't want to have to take Biology instead.

I think I am having a cultural issue with one of my roommates, whom I will refer to as Mulan. She leaves everything outside of her room in the common areas. For example, currently outside her door are 6 pairs of shoes, a vacuum, and a huge pile of newspapers. These are a permanent fixture. Not too annoying except for the fact that her door is right at the top of her stairs, so every time I leave my room I have to navigate around them. I just know one day I am going to trip and take a nose dive down the stairs. She also has random stuff all over the house. Like in the upstairs living room she has a computer chair, microwave, laundry bag full of something, and about 8 big boxes. Downstairs living room is filled with a stack of her papers from last year. I can understand if her room is full and she needs extra space, but that is not the case. HER ROOM IS EMPTY. You open the door and it is clean and spotless. So random. Anywho, that is not the purpose of this paragraph. The real reason I gave you all of this information is because she has added a new addition to the living room. Right between the sofa and chair is a basket full of . . . PANTIES. Yup. I have no idea why. I find this highly disturbing. I mean, I can handle the other stuff, but keeping your panties in the living room is just plain weird. How would you suggest I handle this?

"Hi Mulan! I noticed you are keeping your panties in the living room. I have no idea what else to say. That should be enough."

And what is she thinking? Hmm . . I have no idea where to keep my panties. The drawer? No. The closet, too obvious. I know! The living room. It is sooo perfect. Why didn't I think of this sooner?"

So my fellow bloggers, what should I do about the pantie situation?

Anthro Dorks Are Not Funny

2008-09-29T16:24:00.001-07:00

Wow, today in class was such a change. I am pretty sure that Professor Ahem got lucky over the weekend because he was so animated during class. He spent about 15 minutes with a slide show of anthro jokes. I was laughing so hard. Most of the people in my class just cracked a smile. Lame. So, later on in the class (it is 3 hours long) Professor Ahem cut the cheese. Yup, you know what I am saying. He acted like nothing happened, but I almost snorted I was trying so hard not to laugh. And how did the rest of my class respond? Nada. Come on. Someone farting in class is funny, no matter who you are. And when it is the professor, it exponentially raises the level of hilarity. I laughed the whole way home just thinking about it.

But, seriously, he was a totally different guy. He was hilarious in class. Maybe some happy pills were involved, I don't know. Then he invited us all out for beers after class next week. I will totally go and get a Diet Coke. I am thinking that I am going to tell everyone I am a recovering alcoholic - just to make it more interesting. Or maybe I will tell them that the terms of my probation will not allow me to consume alcohol. That would be really funny.

Now I have to seriously hit the books. I wrote a paper last night, I have to write one tonight, and I will need to write another one tomorrow night. Sob!! I have so much homework for my Wednesday class I am weeping uncontrollably just thinking about it. That class is seriously holding my life hostage. Seriously.

Week In Review

2008-09-27T23:39:00.000-07:00

Number of Papers: 2

Number of Presentations: 2

Number of Handouts created for Presentations: 2

Novels Read Avoiding Homework: 3

Number of Netflix Movies Watched: 1

Number of Chapters Supposed to Have Read for School: 13

Number of Chapters Actually Read: 9

Number of Hours in the Lab: 5

Number of Ants in My Kitchen: 1,000

Number of Misspelled Words in Firedude's Lab Report: 15

Number of Times I Was Asked for Spare Change: 10

Number of Really Ugly Backpacks Purchased that I Can't Live Without: 1

Very Important Lesson

2008-09-27T00:10:00.000-07:00

Wow, I just learned a very valuable thing. The Super Walmart is PACKED FULL OF MEN at 11:30 on a Friday night. I am pretty sure that I was the only female in the place. Of course, they were all buying alcohol or brownie mix (hmm I wonder what that is for), but it was still a nice parade of man flesh. Drool. Yay!!! I now have plans every Friday night. Wahoooo!!!!

HELL

2008-09-23T23:52:00.000-07:00

So tired
Want to sleep
Still have homework
Massive headache
Diet Coke is all gone

Happy One Month Anniversary!!

2008-09-19T13:56:00.001-07:00

Dear Reno,

Happy Anniversary!

I can't believe we have been seeing each other for an entire month. You have brought so much to my life: stress, a new driver's license, an appreciation for people with teeth.

Can't wait to see what the next month will bring!

XoXoooXXXo,
Natalie

2 Hour Exam

2008-09-14T13:19:00.001-07:00

About a month ago I randomly applied for a Library Aide position at the county library. It was only 15 hours a week and paid 17 bucks an hour. Who is going to pass that up? So last week I got a call asking me to come in and take a 2 hours exam. Yup. A 2 hour exam. For a Library Aide position - shelving books. LAME!! So, I show up to take my exam and there are about 50 people there. Yup, I said 50. Then I found out that this was the fourth session of testing. I am pretty sure every person in Reno applied for the job. 200 people taking a 2 hour exam! They don't send you the results for a month, and then interviews start. So in total it takes 2 months just to get an interview. 17 bucks in awesome, but that is ridiculous!

What else? I locked myself out of my apartment yesterday. LAME!!! I walked my study partner to the gate (Not firedude :( but Jane and Michael Banks. Jane and Michael Banks is one person. Her last name just happens to be Banks, so every time I hear her name I think of Mary Poppins and someone singing Jane and Michael Banks. Confused much?) So, in the 30 seconds it took me to walk to the gate all my roommates left and locked me out. :( It costs 15 bucks if you call the front office to let you in. Being the NOEL cheapskate I am, I decided to wait. An hour later, I realized it was Saturday night and my roomies were probably gone for the night. So I went to the apartment next door and called the office to come let me in (15 bucks!!). They told me they would be right over. AN HOUR LATER they show. During this time I got to hang out with my next door neighbors. I will refer to them as Q and Bloody Lips. Q didn't speak English very well and introduced himself as a letter of the alphabet. NOT A JOKE. Bloody Lips had just that, Bloody Lips. I know what you are wondering. And I have no idea. It isn't something you can ask in a polite conversation. Excuse me, Bloody Lips. I noticed that your lips are bleeding. Not just a part of them, but YOUR ENTIRE LIPS. Is that normal? So, to make a long story short, the lady shows up and hour later just as two of my roommates come home. 15 bucks!!!

Did I also mention that the smoke alarm is beeping every five minutes in the room next door?

pROJECT rENO

2008-09-11T21:22:00.000-07:00

Hello my little bloggers. This new entry comes to you by request. Yes, I am in demand. Please forgive if this entry seems a little discombobulated. I am writing as I watch Project Runway. Yes, I said Project Runway. Don’t judge. I want to be like Heidi Klum and tell people they are OUT. How cool would my life be if I could look at someone who was really bugging me and say, _____ you are out. And then, if I really really liked someone, I could look at them and say ______ you are in. Uhhhhhh to have that much power!
I am going to take a page out of Odd Thomas and refer to everyone in Reno with nicknames. This being said, the first person I would tell off is Professor Ahem. Yes, my professor who can’t go 5 words without clearing his throat or saying the word okay. I am not high strung or anything, but it drives me crazy. I want to slap him and tell him to take a public speaking class. He also makes the most random connections. No one, ahem, in class can, ahem, follow his train, ahem of thought, okay, ahem. I am going to be in big, ahem, trouble, ahem because, I can already tell, okay, that I don’t, ahem, make the same connections, ahem, that he does.
That being said, my class at the community college is, how shall we say this, interesting. The guy who sits right next to me is studying to be a firefighter. Yes, I said firefighter. Drool. But alas, firedude is about as dumb as they come. How do I know this, drool? Because firedude is also my lab partner. Drool. Basically lab involves me happily doing all the work, trying to include firedude in the process. Here is a peek into lab today:
Me: Okay, firedude. We need to figure out the percentage of offspring that will be albinos. First we need to make a Punnett square. Is albinism dominant or recessive?
Firedude: Um . . . geez, um I have no idea.
Me: No problem, I will do it all. Just tell me is this a big “A” or a little “a.”
Firedude: Um . . . Big “A.”
Me: Yes! You are so smart! I will write the entire essay. You can just sit there and text your hot firefriends. Bat eyelashes. Firedude, you are IN!!!

Ways I Avoided Doing My Homework Today

2008-09-05T19:43:00.001-07:00

Added 115 movies to my Netflix queue.
Checked mailbox 4 times.
Walked to Valley Market -should be called Ghetto Market.
Watched downloadable movies from Netflix.
Wrote on my blog.
Took out the garbage.
Looked at the wall.
Called Jonny Gunn, Mom and Stacie.
Picked my nose 15 times.
Deleted old email messages.
Reinacted Grease.
Sharpened pencils.
Read other people's blogs.

Working for the Weekend

2008-08-31T21:46:00.000-07:00

I think for the first time in my life I spent the entire weekend studying. Ugh. I did not even get close to finishing everything I have to do. :( My biggest nemesis? I have to give a presentation on a chapter in my textbook. Doesn't sound too hard, I know. I was just really lucky and was assigned the most confusing chapter in the history of the world. I am not using hyperbole - it is the truth. Every chapter following it is like reading Big Dog, Little Dog in its simplicity. And I have to present the chapter that I am pretty sure even the author had no idea what the heck he was talking about. I have read it like 4 times and still do not get it. :( But at least I am not bitter about it.

Today I actually went to the correct ward. I can tell I am homesick because I was listening to all the talks and singing the Hymns and thinking this is so great. Normally I am doing everything I can to stay awake -biting my tongue, keeping my feet off the floor, etc. I even went to choir practice. Okay, that just shows how much I didn't want to do my homework. Tomorrow I will avoid my homework by taking pics for y'all to see the wonders of my apartment. This will be a sight to behold believe me. Psych! In reality I probably won't have time to do that, so sometime in the next week it'll happen.
I think I need to rename this blog stream of consciousness. There is some sort of liberation about just writing whatever the heck you feel like. Yup, I am from Utah. I have said heck twice in this posting. AHHHHHH reveling in my Utahness. AHHHHHHHHH.

El Fin Week 1

2008-08-29T20:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I survived the first week. Today we had orientation for the graduate program. Let's just say that I have a ton to do before I have my degree in hand. Namely my little friend named Thesis. This is my new favorite swearword. For example, if I stub my toe I can yell THESIS!!!! If someone cuts me off in traffic, I can shake my fist and yell "THESISHOLE." I invite any and all of you to join me in this revolution.

Wednesday I had my Graduate Seminar in Archaeology and Prehistory. I have more work to do than I ever though imaginable. But I heard that this is the hardest course in the program, so if I can pass this, I can pass anything. If all of you would please pray that I can pass this class I will greatly appreciate it.

I will now spend the entire weekend trying to avoid my homework, and then crying the night before it is due.

2008-08-25T17:47:00.000-07:00

First day of class: Graduate Seminar in Cultural Anthropology. 15 students. 9 women, 6 men. 8 Masters students, 7 PhD students. Yup, I said PhD students. I have to hold my own against them. Craptastic.

Class begins with an roll call of sorts. State your name, credentials, and focus. For example: Jane Doe, BS in Anthropology - MA in Archeology, focus Archeology especially zooarcheology. After 13 other people introduced themselves each with a clear focus - Me: Natalie, BS in Psychology - have no idea what my focus is. My professor: Good luck Miss Psychological. Natalie: flipped professor off and ran out of class. Okay, everything but the last part happened. So I basically looked lame. Oh well.

Section 2 consisted of watching a film about how truth is relevant. I am pretty sure that it was from 1982 because the computers it featured reminded me of War Games. Said film followed British professor around the world explaining how no one can really know anything. Only part I remember - insane 1982 special effects showing a witch getting burned at the stake and her face melting off (think Raiders of the Lost Ark). 5-6 page paper on movie is due next week. Pretty sure professor does not want me to mention movie references.

Can anyone name the Christian League reference?

2008-08-24T16:23:00.000-07:00

Day 1-4
Apparently in Natalieland time is not linear. It is my blog and time can function however I please. I like being supreme ruler over my blog.

Anyway, here are some highlights from the first few days.

Day 2: So I sit here in a huge mess as I try to stuff my entire life into an 11' x 13' room. My parents have been great. They are sticking around to help me out, so I haven't been too lonely. I have two Asian roommates, one from Beijing and one from Japan, and one American. The kitchen is a mess!! Everyone has their own things, so there are 4 dish soaps, 4 sets of pans, 4 sets of dishes etc. Needless to say there is no room for my stuff. I am probably going to have to store it in my tiny room!! What an adventure. LOL. I have basically spent the past two days putting together all of my IKEA furniture, so now I am a pro! Tomorrow I have orientation from 9:30 to 2:30. Why they have to orient me for 5 hours, I have no idea. BORING!!!!! My bedroom window looks out on the baseball field, so I can hear the marching band practicing at various hours throughout the day. It is pretty crazy. I wish I had more exciting news, but I have just been unpacking.

Day 3: Orientation was lame. It was a bunch of Yay! We are in school and it is going to be hard. Yay!! I ended up leaving early because it was just too much. I went to the bookstore and bought my books instead. The football team was there buying books so I just followed around a bunch of man flesh. Yum!! I don't see my roommates very much. I get the feeling that everyone just does their own things. There should be five of us, but only four rooms are filled. We will probably get a new roommate at some point. Ling, from China is the one I see the most. She always has a friend over and they just speak in Chinese all the time. She has stuff everywhere! She has lived here for 2 years so she basically has taken over the place. Miki, the girl from Japan, is never here. Mary, my other roommate has lived here about a week and she has never even seen Miki. It is pretty funny. I saw her only once and I said Hi and she just walked away. I am have decided that she must not speak English very well (or she is just rude.) LOL. This is definitely different than Utah. All of the gas stations have slot machines. I could become a gambling addict and flunk out of school. That is about all I have seen of Reno, oh and Wal-Mart. I am almost all moved in, so I can hopefully go out and explore. My parents are going to go home tomorrow, and then I am going to be all alone. :( I need to find me some hot men. That is about it. I am sure I will have more exciting things when I actually start school next week. Crazy! I can't believe I actually live here. It is a little surreal.

Day 4: So my parents went home today. My mom and I were sobbing, and my dad even had some tears in his eyes. I had a good cry the first night I was here. I missed everyone so much and I had been here less than 24 hours!! LOL. I am such a dork. I have been trying to keep busy. My parents did take some stuff home, but they accidentally left a big pile of odds and ends, so now I have to figure out what to do with them. Ugg. Oh well. I am down to the end, it is almost ready. It totally looks like an anthro nerd's room. I put up a bunch of my masks from around the world on the wall above my desk. I have one from China, three from El Sal, one from New Zealand and one from London. I decided I am obsessed with people because I noticed all the stuff I bring back is figures of people. LOL. NERD!! I forgot to tell you the best part of orientation yesterday. I met another person in my Anthro program. She is probably 45 and from Montana. Let's just say the first thing I noticed about her is the awesome haircut with the giant rat tail in the back. Then she grabbed her backpack and had two "Gay Pride" buttons on the back. It was so obvious. LOL. I totally feel like I am back in college again. Someone is playing Bon Jovi super loud. So dormish. My roommates were all supposed to be grad students, but I found out they are all undergrad. Mary is only 22. I feel like an old lady. It is her birthday today. I was going to see if she wanted to go to a movie or something, but she hasn't come out of her room. As I said, everyone just does their own thing. Mary is a health ecology major. I don't know what Ling and Miki are. Ling is always cooking and it smells good. My mom said I should hire her to be my cook because I can only make Ramen Noodles. I told her I have been to China and it seems she thought that was pretty cool. I have a scroll that I brought back from there and I want to ask her what it says. It probably says "Some stupid American paid 50 bucks for this piece of crap." But since it is all Chinese it looks beautiful. :) Now Pussy Cat Dolls are blaring. I would die without MapQuest. I went to the community college and bought my used textbook for 100 bucks. Ugg. It is in a really pretty setting, up on the "mountain." (Hill compared to the mountains in Utah.) And the parking is free!!! Yay!!! I just discovered that I can download audiobooks from the library to my laptop. I have been listening to books nonstop to take my mind off of the fact that I now live in Reno. I was in target today and some guy offered me a job. He said it involved "financial planning." I have no idea if I want to get involved with that. But he said that a lot of students do it. I hate that all the shows are an hour later here. I don't want to have to stay up late to watch shows that are usually on at nine!! The marching band just started up. LOL.

Day 5

2008-08-23T20:45:00.001-07:00

As requested, a blog of my time in Reno.

Let's compare Salt Lake and Reno shall we?

Salt Lake: 15 miles over the speed limit

Reno: 15 miles under the speed limit

Salt Lake: LDS chapel on every corner

Reno: Wedding chapel on every corner

Salt Lake: Ski Utah license plates

Reno: Support your local firefighter license plates!

Salt Lake: Gas stations filled with sugary goodness

Reno: Gas stations filled with slot machines

Salt Lake: the night skyline features beautiful temples

Reno: the night skyline is filled with casinos

Salt Lake: Everyone is a returned missionary

Reno: Everyone is a retired stripper